me last night:
“New Year. New me. 2018 is definitely going to be the year I get my shit together.”
me this morning:
“Hi, I’m in my hotel room past check out puking up my $100 NYE meal. My foot is broken from a drunk fall and I can’t walk or drive. Can you come here and pick up my car from valet then take me on a hunt for my debit card, and then to my Daddy so he can take me to the doctor?”
I guess I’m starting the New Year on the right foot
… because I can’t put any weight on my left foot
*Ba-dum-tis*
—natalie michelle
Flommist Natalie Michelle doesn’t have a bio. She just rants. Copyright © 2018 Natalie Michelle.
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