lunchtime phone interview

So to­day I had a lunchtime phone in­ter­view that I was re­al­ly ex­cit­ed about, but be­cause I am hob­bled I could­n’t walk to my car to do it.

So I find a qui­et space near the lob­by away from peo­ple and go over my notes and wait for the call. When sud­den­ly, my su­per­vi­sor who is a lunch walk­er starts tak­ing laps right by my table.

Then TWO of my com­pa­ny VPs start tak­ing laps, so now I’m, like, crap they’ll be able to hear me so I move ta­bles which to­tal­ly at­tracts their sus­pi­cions and they are all giv­ing me weird looks every time they walk by (like every two minutes).

Now lest you think in my life that is where the awk­ward­ness stops, do not be mis­tak­en be­cause as if this in­san­i­ty is­n’t enough, not one, not two, but a se­ries of FIVE solo lunch­ers come and sit by me.

So I now have to do this in­ter­view with my boss­es lap­ping me every oth­er ques­tion and an au­di­ence of dudes eat­ing their packed lunch­es (oh and the solo lunch­ers ALL were lis­ten­ing based on how every time I looked up from my notes they were staring).

On the plus side, if any­one wants to know how the in­ter­view went I can tell them to ask PB in His Mouth Cor­ners or Cut His Crusts Off or Is That a Half-eat­en Mc­Don­ald’s Burg­er You Gross Weirdo or any of their oth­er sad clear­ly bach­e­lor friends I made today.

THANKS LIFE.

—na­tal­ie michelle

Flom­mist Na­tal­ie Michelle does­n’t have a bio. She just rants. Copy­right © 2015 Na­tal­ie Michelle.

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