german whip

Since I was so en­tranced by the af­ter­mar­ket cus­tom white leather in­te­ri­or and earth­quak­ing sound sys­tem of my Maz­da, I didn’t do prop­er due dili­gence on the garbage en­gi­neer­ing of the en­gine and now my new months-long 2019 project is go­ing to be lit­er­al­ly lift­ing the en­gine out to re­pair a FUCK­ING WA­TER PUMP, I bought a new whip to dri­ve un­til I get the time to fix the bas­tard.

Since it’s just a tem­po­rary car, I broke all the rules of re­spon­si­ble car buy­ing (I clear­ly did not learn my les­son) and bought an old­er 325I that is go­ing to be my sec­ondary project be­cause go­dammit this lit­tle beast is a hot rod and there are so many per­for­mance good­ies that I will stu­pid­ly buy be­cause god­for­bid I ever dri­ve a sim­ple re­li­able car again …

My last BMW went to 300,000 miles, I don’t even want to talk about the low ass miles this garbage en­gine crapped out on. The fuck­ing wa­ter pump leaks into the oil pan and I don’t even want to talk about what is in­volved in FIX­ING THE WA­TER PUMP.

BMWs are cob­bly but noth­ing like that.
 

And guys, “tem­po­rary car,” I’m go­ing dri­ve this for the time pe­ri­od it takes to fix my oth­er whip and then do a bunch of dumb per­for­mance shit be­cause it will be fun.

And I’m go­ing to spend more on af­ter­mar­ket shit than what the car cost.

Also I lit­er­al­ly al­most bought this fuck­ing Fiero be­cause I thought it would be hi­lar­i­ous, so I mean I feel like this was ac­tu­al­ly a rel­a­tive­ly smart choice.

I mean, noth­ing says “re­spon­si­ble car” like an over­pow­ered Fiero.
 
 

—na­tal­ie michelle

Flom­mist Na­tal­ie Michelle does­n’t have a bio. She just rants. Copy­right © 2019 Na­tal­ie Michelle.

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