wat if: covid dealings

 
wat if ted las­so dealt with covid ···

Every­one would be vac­ci­nat­ed ex­cept Jamie Tartt. Through­out the episode, Roy would be ha­rass­ing Jamie to get vaccinated. 

(“Oi!”)

He’d get through to him by ex­plain­ing that it’s im­por­tant every­one who can be vac­ci­nat­ed, is vac­ci­nat­ed, be­cause his niece Phoebe can’t be vac­ci­nat­ed yet.

He’d de­scribe the virus as be­ing just like him: “It’s here, it’s there, it’s every fuckin’ where!”

Jamie would ad­mit that he’s just scared and his dad is a huge anti-vaxxer. 

Roy and Kee­ley go with him to get the vac­cine and take care of him through his re­ac­tion afterward. 

Then Jamie tells his dad off, but also that he hopes he’ll still get the vaccine.

 

wat if rick and morty dealt with covid ···

rick:  In­vent­ed COVID. In­vent­ed the vac­cine. Also has the cure but won’t re­lease it be­cause now that the vac­cine is killing stu­pid peo­ple, he wants to see how this plays out. (Main­ly hop­ing it’ll kill Jerry.)

morty:  Doesn’t want to get vac­ci­nat­ed be­cause Jes­si­ca won’t get vaccinated

beth:  Is vaccinated.

jer­ry:  Isn’t vac­ci­nat­ed, re­fus­es to get vac­ci­nat­ed, and keeps try­ing to steal iver­mectin from Beth’s vet­eri­nary clinic.

sum­mer:  Isn’t vac­ci­nat­ed and thinks heal­ing crys­tals and sup­ple­ments will pro­tect her.

 

wat if com­mu­ni­ty dealt with covid ···

jeff:  Got the shot and every­one knows it but is still ve­he­ment­ly anti-vax anyway.

brit­ta:  Full on QAnon crazy.

shirley:  Re­ly­ing on Je­sus to save her.

abed:  Se­cret­ly got the shot when it was first avail­able and isn’t telling anyone.

troy:  Was con­vinced by Abed to get the shot, also isn’t say­ing anything.

pierce:  Re­fus­es to do any­thing “the man” wants him to do.

an­nie:  Is will­ing to try every­thing ex­cept the shot, thinks it’s im­por­tant to “ask ques­tions.”

chang:  Got the shot and is con­stant­ly yelling at every­one about how stu­pid they are.

dean pel­ton:  Got all three shots and is try­ing to get the boost­er for each one as well.

Then, An­nie breaks into the Green­dale eques­tri­an club to get iver­mectin only to find out the school doesn’t ac­tu­al­ly have hors­es. It’s all theory.

Brit­ta full-on be­lieves there is a dun­geon un­der­neath the school and uses a play­ful pil­low fort to hide her ex­ca­va­tion efforts.

Pierce re­fus­es to wear a mask but de­cides he will prove how fool­ish all of this is by wear­ing an old div­ing suit from the late 1800s.

His id­io­cy proves use­ful as Brit­ta’s QAnon ex­ca­va­tion rup­tures a wa­ter pipe and Star­burst has to be res­cued from the lunchroom.

Pierce is hailed as a hero un­til Abed checks Twit­ter and an­nounces that Elon Musk called Pierce “Pedo Guy.”

Jeff im­me­di­ate­ly or­ders 2,500 Pierce the Pedo Guy shirts to sell around school.

And at the end of the episode, they all ad­mit they’ve been vac­ci­nat­ed (ex­cept for Brit­ta, who they all yell at). 

Dean Pel­ton, who is triple vac­ci­nat­ed, catch­es a break­through case from the Hu­man Being.
 

So

how can we make any of this a thing??
 

 

—emi­ly duchaine – with ad­di­tion­al text by matt g.

Flom­mist Emi­ly Duchaine lives in the Pa­cif­ic North­west. She likes to drink mead, learn about sharks, and lis­ten to the Talk­ing Heads. She pre­tends to be a pro­fes­sion­al busi­ness­woman most days. Copy­right © 2021 Emi­ly Duchaine. (Thanks, Matt!)

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