I know a lot of people are varying degrees of disappointed because either there will be no celebrating in person or their festivities will be significantly cut back. There are many different ways to feel about the holidays in even the best of times and however much you do or don’t like this time of year is entirely within your right to feel that way.
I’ve never made any attempt to hide my opinion of it. For all those of you who truly do love this time of year and look forward to it with great anticipation and excitement, I am genuinely sorry things are the way they are. Hopefully you will be able to resume observing the holidays normally this time next year.
That being said, I’m fucking loving this.
You’d never know it was Christmas if you lived in our house unless you looked outside at our neighbor’s lights across the street. We haven’t put up a single decoration and it’s not for any reason other than that we are exhausted by everything that has happened in the past
*runs the numbers*
1,400+ days,
especially the last 346 of them.
We just simply couldn’t be arsed to give a dimmadamn about A N Y of it.
I finally just took down and put away the few Halloween decorations I had up LAST WEEKEND. For some, decorating brings them a sense of calm and happiness and peace.
And that’s really important. I’m getting all that from pretending this year that there’s absolutely nothing special about December 25 except that it’s Friday and I don’t work on Fridays anyway.
In a way it feels like Christmas lasts a third of the year and it just never stops. Decorations hit some stores as early as September. This is due to a cycle of supply and demand because the stores want to squeeze every last penny out of consumers and some people just really cannot wait to start putting up the decorations they took down less than eight months ago.
When I was kid I can remember stores not decorating for Christmas until at least after Thanksgiving, if not the early morning of December 1st before the doors opened.
Black Friday now lasts the entire month of November and sometimes into December. And there have been way too many times I’ve gone into a store on December 26 and there is already Valentine’s crap on the shelves, but that’s another topic altogether …
Christmas honestly hasn’t felt very special or fun since I was a pre-teen, and it’s taken years of slogging through obligation after giving into pressure and guilt due to the sake of tradition for me to realize and accept that.
It has nothing to do with gifts or make believe or money, either. I’m sure I’d probably feel differently if I had kids or I were religious but I don’t and I’m not. I’m not a grinch or a miser or a Scrooge, I simply just don’t care.
My ideal holiday is throwing our cocktail party ten days before Christmas, having an intimate dinner with my husband on Christmas Eve, and hosting an open house Christmas Day so anyone who wants to (family, friends, coworkers, neighbors) can pop in for a few minutes for a warm drink and a little gift.
No mountains of presents, no house full of family who stays for 10–12 hours, no huge feasts that take hours if not days to prepare, none of that. It would be more an observation of winter and solstice and sharing our good fortune and cheer. And that’s it.
I’m the least stressed I’ve ever been in my adult life on December 16, and it’s because on Christmas Day Aaron and I will sleep in, spend the day in our pajamas, eat a manageable meal in the quiet of our home, and sign on for a Zoom chat once or twice during the day to watch some people open their gifts. And that’s it.
This pandemic is horrible and tragic and disgusting, and the trauma we are experiencing from this will be with us the rest of our lives. But one twist of fate in it all (cruel for some, welcome for me) is that I get a much needed break from celebrating the holiday season, no exceptions.
And maybe that will make me miss it a little more and be a little more excited for it next time. Maybe.
—emily duchaine
Flommist Emily Duchaine lives in the Pacific Northwest. She likes to drink mead, learn about sharks, and listen to the Talking Heads. She pretends to be a professional businesswoman most days. Copyright © 2020 Emily Duchaine.
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