you’re beautiful

It is hard to tell your­self you are beau­ti­ful.
Very few ever see us at our most in­ti­mate mo­ments.
The ones we face every­day we look at the mir­ror,
the times we look down see­ing our hands, or the mo­ments we hear our voice.

A woman told me the oth­er day I had the sweet­est sound­ing voice
and I can’t ex­plain how much that mo­ment made me feel heard.

I’m a rough soul and I have flaws.
Ones dri­ven by pas­sion and heart.
Flaws I look at to rip my­self apart.

I’m look­ing in at it all to find how to fix it with­in my­self be­cause I feel I hold that pow­er.

I feel I hold the pow­er to fix the worlds prob­lems that ex­tend to the worse de­grees of our an­i­mal be­hav­ior to the lit­tlest prob­lems of the day.

But all this rip­ping and tak­ing apart of my­self has out leashed parts of me I have felt un­hap­py with.
Ones wres­tled in anger and con­fu­sion.
The rest­less voice of say­ing why can’t I just fix it, why can’t I change it, I know I can.

That’s just it.
It is the mo­ment I take my­self down and place the be­lief I can’t that I lose my pow­er.

And the un­der­stand­ing has to come not from look­ing at my­self as fail­ing but look at my­self as sep­a­rate from it all.

My words won’t fall on deaf ears,
my writ­ings won’t com­mu­ni­cate to the blind,
my ac­tions won’t touch those who are not present and only I can wit­ness all the things I do with­in my sens­es.

I have to trust in that.
I have to trust in my­self.
I have to know my­self and I do.

The best thing I can do is tell my­self I am beau­ti­ful and all those flaws are part of that beau­ty.
 
 

—al­ley schef­f­ki

Flom­mist Al­ley Schef­f­ki is 22 years young, ‘I am the blue rose. Dies ist ein wun­sch für frei­heit.’ Copy­right © 2016 Al­ley Schef­f­ki.

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