well, you see, giraffes have long necks

old/busted
Hang­ing out all day at craft fairs to sell your art.

new/hotnezz
Trick­ing peo­ple into a semi-trail­er, lock­ing them in and tak­ing their stuff.
 

Plan.

Gonna watch Tal­ent­ed Mr. Ripley
and end it at the
part where he’s
in the suit and
then it’s just
a fun movie about
a guy whose dream
is to try on a
suit in Italy.

I’ve lived this dream
by the way, and I
didn’t have to murder
Jude Law with an oar
to do it.

Also

I sore­ly want to live in the 1989 NYC of When Har­ry Met Sal­ly for­ev­er and frankly I think I have earned this.

Fight me.
 

The world has com­plete­ly changed.

Like, cock­tails to go be­came a thing.

Teenagers are mil­len­ni­als. Tweens are mil­len­ni­als. Kids, tod­dlers and zy­gotes are millennials.

Ba­bies born 100 years from now? Thats right. Millennials.
 

This guy just sat next to you at the par­ty and wants to talk about All Things Must Pass.

 

There is no bet­ter se­ries right now than r/HermanCainAward.

Binge. Wor­thy.

You would think a True Crime Mur­der Mys­tery would suf­fer from lack­ing the Mys­tery part but it’s still so darn satisfying.

 

So there’s high.

And there’s   “Hey, I should watch D.C. Cab”   high.

 

God darn it I love Lil Nas X.

 

RIP Melvin Van Pee­bles.

Sweet Sweet­back blew my Mid­west hon­key mind as a young teen liv­ing in Ne­bras­ka and opened and in­formed my per­spec­tive in im­mea­sur­able ways.

 

When you or­der your Neil Patrick Har­ris from wish.com.
 

Thank you to all the right wing nut jobs who talked about crit­i­cal race the­o­ry ALL summer. 

My stu­dents could not wait for me to ex­plain it to them & talk about struc­tur­al racism.

The top­ic of CRT nev­er came up in class un­til this year. 

Gen Z is go­ing to vote you all out @GOP

— Sari Beth Rosen­berg (@saribethrose) Sep­tem­ber 17, 2021

Maybe we all need to per­ma­nent­ly so­cial­ly dis­tance our­selves from Republicans.

I’m just kid­ding. Of course we do.
 

#na­tureisheal­ing

Since we’ve all been at home, mankind’s foot­print has dra­mat­i­cal­ly shrunk.

There were re­ports that at Dis­ney­land, gi­raffes were rid­ing the Matterhorn.

And get­ting knocked the fuck out.

 

—ja­son malmberg

Flom­mist Ja­son Malm­berg is a sim­ple man who be­lieves in brown liquor and small dogs. He also makes art some­times. Copy­right © 2021 Ja­son Malmberg.

PLEASE   SUPPORT   FLOMM
TIPS  +  DONATIONS  DISCREETLY  ACCEPTED

FLOMM
promotes learning  +  education worldwide
drawing attention to works by nü  +  upcoming artists,
designers, writers, musicians  +  MOR

OUR INVOLVEMENT
– however –
is mostly paid for out of pocket or in trade

IF YOU ENJOY
wat  FLOMM  is doing here, please consider


1.   LEAVE US A TIP  :
use our tip jar whenever the mood hits



2.   BUY OUR SWAG  :
our approach is semi-green —
                all our  FLOMMHAUS  merch is made to order



3.   HELP US OUT  :
use our hashtags  #flomm  #flommus  #whereisflomm  #nüflommart  #flommist
when posting on ur socials —
or drop us a note and offer to help in some way
everything we do is on a volunteer basis —
             when we say  YOU CAN BE A FLOMMIST TOO  this is wat we mean

THANK YOU
your support helps our continued efforts
to create content across numerous platforms

clic 「 HIER   」 to return to the DER TUNG front page