evangelical

Jim­my Carter
Ac­tu­al Christian 

The kind that can quote scrip­ture on re­quest. Spends his re­main­ing years build­ing homes with Habi­tat for Humanity. 

> Men­tion his name to an evan­gel­i­cal Chris­t­ian and they can hard­ly con­tain their bile
 

Don­ald Trump
Bare­ly pre­tends to be spir­i­tu­al in any way 

Vi­o­lates near­ly every com­mand­ment dai­ly. Spends his re­main­ing years work­ing to take away peo­ples’ free­dom, health care, right to vote, sex­u­al dig­ni­ty, the list goes on.

> Men­tion his name to an evan­gel­i­cal Chris­t­ian and they can’t stop jizzing themselves
 

“God works in mys­te­ri­ous ways.
So none of this has to make sense.
Cuz mag­ic or whatever.”

—ja­son malmberg

Flom­mist Ja­son Malm­berg is a sim­ple man who be­lieves in brown liquor and small dogs. He also makes art some­times. Copy­right © 2017 Ja­son Malmberg.

MOR D’ARTÍCULOS  MOR FLOMM !

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back to school blues got you down? let’s get reeaadyyyy to fal­l­l­l­l­llse equivocate! you don’t get to call your­self a ‘chris­t­ian’ fab­u­lous­flomm­ness the right to a hobby a ro­tis­serie chicken liv­ing their faith re­pub­li­can chris­tian­i­ty is just a se­cret handshake