and she did it in four inch heels

Nan­cy Pelosi is near­ly 80-years-old and she spent over 8 hours on her feet yes­ter­day fight­ing for Dreamers. 

Con­verse­ly, it’s been two years and you still haven’t both­ered look­ing up what ‘ne­olib­er­al’ means in spite of you us­ing it (wrong­ly) all the time to call out peo­ple who ac­tu­al­ly *do* shit for not be­ing as woke as you pre­sume your­self to be. 

But blah blah blah ‘es­tab­lish­ment’ or whatever.

And yes, I would like room for cream and sug­ar thanks.

“In ’82, Michael and I went back in the stu­dio for an­oth­er week af­ter wrap­ping Thriller to cut some sides for this E.T. record he want­ed to do. The whole time we were in there Jer­maine kept show­ing up with one of those Mer­lin toys, the ones that were a mem­o­ry game with beeps and boops and he’s try­ing to get on the record mak­ing the alien moth­er­ship sound from Close En­coun­ters. Even­tu­al­ly I had to get him with a fire ex­tin­guish­er and run him off the park­ing lot. Like, ‘moth­er­fuck­er, every­one can do that! It’s not special!’”
—Quin­cy Jones unleashed

I love this man any­way, but Give No Fucks Quin­cy is drop­ping bombs in this piece.

“Herb Alpert had cab­bage farts that could tar­nish the brass in­stru­ments of his own band, but I’m a Pisces so you did­n’t hear that shit from me.”
—Quin­cy Jones unleashed

These here are crazy times. 

“Bran­do used to go cha-cha danc­ing with us. He could dance his ass off. He was the most charm­ing moth­er­fuck­er you ever met. He’d fuck any­thing. Any­thing! He’d fuck a mailbox.”

Still, gay or not, if Mar­lon Bran­do in his prime want­ed to bang you you prob­a­bly should just bang.
 
 

—ja­son malmberg

Flom­mist Ja­son Malm­berg is a sim­ple man who be­lieves in brown liquor and small dogs. He also makes art some­times. Copy­right © 2018 Ja­son Malm­berg. Hed swiped from Shokooh Miry.

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