Can I just real quick say that this hit a nerve …
My current boyfriend, who is the most loving, most precious, most patient and understanding human being ever, is like this. He has never once matched my tantrums, no matter how petty or serious. He lets me ride it out, talks to me, reminds me he loves me, and hugs me when I’m over it. And that’s AWESOME. He makes me genuinely #SMILE, and not the fake kind. 😉
But you know what’s NOT awesome?
When your (thankfully ex)partner doesn’t just STOP YOU FROM FEELING YOUR FEELINGS, but he also OUTMATCHES YOUR ANGER. He’ll tell you you’re an “ungrateful jerk” and “how dare you get angry when I’ve spoiled you” and “you’d better rethink your words and your attitude or you’re out of this apartment.”
For two years, I was not allowed to so much as frown or express dissatisfaction under threat of being thrown out into the streets.
If your partner does that to you as my ex did to me, RUN. You deserve better. You deserve someone who’ll love you for all your moods and respects you as a thinking, breathing, emoting human being.
—samantha costanilla
Flommist Samantha Costanilla is a jack-of-all-trades/master-of-none who dabbles in various hobbies such as fiber crafts, poetry, tarot reading, learning new languages, and judging sketchy typography in restaurant menus. She also survived The Snap. Copyright © 2018 Samantha Costanilla. Image: Catana Comics.
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