You guys!
Today is the day!
JFK Jr will reveal himself and take Pence’s place as Trumps running mate!
Q has forsee’d this!
Meanwhile,
Guiliani leaks texts between Biden and his son showing what an unconditionally caring father he is and MAGA trash think this will embarrass Joe.
Then, Rudy’s own daughter enters the fray with a plea to vote out Trump and his lackeys like Rudy.
“He’s a good dad!
What a fucking pussy!
KAG2020!!!!!”
At this point even John Voight has to Google “who’s John Voight?” when he sees John Voight tweeting MAGA nonsense.
If you aren’t
thoroughly excited about voting Biden/Harris yet, might I suggest finding your bliss in how thoroughly *wrecked* all those 48 year old goatee-and-Oakleys fishing dads will be on Nov forth if you do?
“At least
I still have my truck.
Just 72 more
monthly payments
and she’s all mine,
snowflakes!”
And somewhere out there an editor is trying to talk some poor writer into doing a post-defeat piece about Republican Party soul-searching that literally nobody believes is actually going to happen.
I AM worried tho
race is gonna tip back to Trump once Hillary’s Buca di Beppo coupons from 2012 get leaked.
Uh, you guys?
This is my first time voting by mail.
Are we always asked to send nudes?
—jason malmberg
Flommist Jason Malmberg is a simple man who believes in brown liquor and small dogs. He also makes art sometimes. Copyright © 2020 Jason Malmberg.
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