A few years ago, I was sitting in a therapist’s office. He asked me what my anxiety would look like if it were a person.
He had no idea that I had already thought about this in depth – every day, all day.
Anxiety and depression isn’t a person. It’s a monster.
A monster who stands behind me and whispers lies into my ears.
A monster who lives inside my heart, and digs its claws into my organs.
A monster who claims to be my only friend.
I soon realized there were many monsters living inside me, and I needed a way to get them out. I started sketching, and scribbling, until I had a few sketchbooks full of them.
Eventually, the sketches evolved into colored renditions, and I found the more I drew them, the less they hurt me.
Instead of ignoring them, I faced them.
Each monster represents something I am feeling, or something I have been through. I started to post them online without explaining their meanings, and people began adding their own descriptions.
I started to notice that what one monster meant to me, was interpreted completely different by someone else. That’s when I understood that everyone has their own monsters.
It was encouraging to hear responses, and feedback; requests for custom drawings and T shirts soon followed.
I’ll probably never explain what the real meaning behind each one is, but I think the fun part is watching others relate to them in their own ways.
My current therapist encouraged me to put my work out there, and I’m glad she did. I pushed myself out of a comfort zone, and into a world where I’m not afraid to share my fears.
My main goal with Melancholy Monsters is to help even one person know they aren’t alone, and that we can fight these creatures together.
Find Briauna’s Melancholy Monsters: Art created from anxiety on Etsy. Coming soon: T shirts and maybe undies.
—briauna rupert
Flommist Briauna Rupert is made up of 50% anxiety, 50% Salsa Verde Doritos. She also doesn’t get mad, “I just make SIMS of my enemies and lock them in the basement.” Copyright © 2017 Briauna Rupert. Pictured up top: Anxiety (detail).
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