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THE BATTLE FOR MODeRN 1923


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me at sephora

God fuck the male gaze, this store is such bull­shit. Do I need a lip plumper? What are ad­e­quate­ly pumped lips any­ways? I mean peo­ple, es­pe­cial­ly women, should be sole­ly judged on their char­ac­ter, not by their ap­pear­ance. God, no won­der grown women have body is­sues, I mean look at this mod­el, she’s eas­i­ly 12. Fuck, should I start wor­ry­ing about deep set wrin­kles? Maybe I should ask the sales rep, NOPE she’s like 16, she would­n’t know any­thing about ag­ing. I don’t con­done this shit at all, dis­tract­ing us with these dumb­fuck beau­ty rit­u­als, as if women had noth­ing more to of­fer so­ci­ety than the abil­i­ty to con­tour. How do they con­tour? That just seems like mag­ic. I mean who the fuck is so­ci­ety to tell peo­ple they have no in­her­ent val­ue be­yond some ge­net­ic roll of the dice, so fuck­ing dumb. I won­der if this fiber lash ex­ten­der works, I mean it seems like it would – it’s only $19, fuck it, I’ll try it. I mean, I’m only here be­cause I’m play­ing the game, beau­ty has a com­mod­i­ty val­ue, they’ve done end­less stud­ies on the priv­i­leges of at­trac­tive­ness. It’s not like me boy­cotting make­up will up­end the pa­tri­archy, but it for sure will get me treat­ed bet­ter at the gro­cery store. This is a re­al­ly pret­ty col­or of teal, I won­der if I could pull off teal eye shad­ow? I mean, I re­al­ly work to not judge peo­ple on their ap­pear­ance, I know how detri­men­tal that shit is, but it does­n’t mean that I’m not be­ing judged, this shit is re­al­ly sur­vival for women. If this is what we have to do to have equal ad­van­tages, fuck it. Wait, I don’t un­der­stand, so yel­low con­ceal­er is for un­der eyes, green is for red spots, but there’s still like 40 oth­er col­ors of con­ceal­er here? Who has good face make up on that can ex­plain this shit to me? I can’t BE­LIEVE I’m spend­ing my hard earned less than a man would make in a com­pa­ra­ble po­si­tion mon­ey on this crap, I’m such a fuck­ing hyp­ocrite. If I was re­al­ly a fem­i­nist, I would have giv­en every sin­gle pen­ny to the women’s shel­ter. I’m ex­cit­ed to try this lip col­or though, I will mas­ter this trend, so cute. How do I even sleep at night, I am lit­er­al­ly every­thing I hate. Okay, maybe I go home and match funds? God I fuck­ing hate my­self.

 

—na­tal­ie michelle

Flom­mist Na­tal­ie Michelle does­n’t have a bio. She just rants. Copy­right © 2017 Na­tal­ie Michelle. Sepho­ra mag­a­zine ads com­pos­ite by mehal­lo.

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Der Tung
Posted
Sun 27 Aug 2017

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