i’m brittle

There’s a piece of me lost here and an­oth­er there.

I find my­self scram­bling to at­tain all the pieces but they’re picked up and tak­en away from me.

I don’t have some­one stand­ing by me to say it’s okay.

No one to say I love you.

It’s just me lost in this place.

As I try to take this step and that

An at­tempt to push through is pushed back.

I can’t tell if it’s me shov­ing my own self back any­more or I’m just meant to stay in this place.

The most ex­haust­ing thing I’ve found to be is hu­man.

I think about how many might read these words,
how many scroll past,
and how many just don’t any­thing af­ter read­ing it all.

Every mo­ment I feel like I’m just ask­ing for some­one to come back and say what my mom would say now.

The love shed hold for me. But she’s gone.

And gone are the peo­ple who care or have time to care, gone is the per­son I loved and tried through every­thing to stay afloat.

But I’m brit­tle and I break and no one wants to re­turn the piece they take.

 
 

—al­ley schef­f­ki

Flom­mist Al­ley Schef­f­ki is 22 years young, ‘I am the blue rose. Dies ist ein wun­sch für frei­heit.’ Copy­right © 2016 Al­ley Schef­f­ki.

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