eat, sex, can we have more beer?

“Hi, I’m Randy and I’ll be your serv­er this evening. Our spe­cial is San­ta Fe Chick­en Ranch Mo­ji­to Pop­pers but I wouldn’t sug­gest this since it’s very gar­licky and may im­pede your fuck­style lat­er. SO, who wants wa­ter?”
 

I’m kind of amazed at how many grown men I’ve seen sug­gest that there’s no rea­son be­yond sex for a man and woman to eat din­ner to­geth­er these past 24 hours in the wake of Mike Pence’s creepy non­sense about his wife.

That shit was tired when Bil­ly Crys­tal said it 28 years ago and it’s even dumb­er now.

Mike Pence re­fus­es to have a meal with a woman, un­less his wife is present. When some Mus­lim women say sim­i­lar about men, GOP at­tacks Is­lam.

— Kaivan Shroff (@KaivanShroff) March 30, 2017

I mean, make no mis­take, if you’re a 30+ year old man that re­al­ly be­lieves this then you failed at mak­ing the jump to Adult.

It’s like,
ever go to the movies and see two bros who *clear­ly came to the movies to­geth­er* put that emp­ty seat be­tween them so I guess we don’t think they came to Lo­gan to blow each oth­er?

Those are the kind of dudes that think like Mike Pence does. Also they prob­a­bly se­cret­ly do want to blow each oth­er.

Though,
in his de­fense, Pence has all this pe­nis see? And it gets into every­thing.

You have to hit it with a spray bot­tle and be like “back, pe­nis!”

This
IS the same train of thought that sug­gests gay dudes will have sex with any man they see giv­en the chance.

Many of my fa­vorite friends are peo­ple I don’t want to put my wein­er on. They are all nice, at­trac­tive peo­ple but I don’t think of them as places to put my din­gal­ing.

Even though Tyler once tried to grab my hang­down.

And
while we’re dis­tract­ed again, Trump vot­ers caused this:

Mike Pence glee­ful­ly breaks tie for Re­pub­li­cans, takes away wom­en’s health care https://t.co/MG8ZMoDQA6

— Dai­ly Kos (@dailykos) March 30, 2017

 
 

—ja­son malm­berg

Flom­mist Ja­son Malm­berg is a sim­ple man who be­lieves in brown liquor and small dogs. He also makes art some­times. Copy­right © 2017 Ja­son Malm­berg. Foto by mehal­lo.

PLEASE   SUPPORT   FLOMM
TIPS  +  DONATIONS  DISCREETLY  ACCEPTED

FLOMM
promotes learning  +  education worldwide
drawing attention to works by nü  +  upcoming artists,
designers, writers, musicians  +  MOR

OUR INVOLVEMENT
– however –
is mostly paid for out of pocket or in trade

IF YOU ENJOY
wat  FLOMM  is doing here, please consider


1.   LEAVE US A TIP  :
use our tip jar whenever the mood hits



2.   BUY OUR SWAG  :
our approach is semi-green —
                all our  FLOMMHAUS  merch is made to order



3.   HELP US OUT  :
use our hashtags  #flomm  #flommus  #whereisflomm  #nüflommart  #flommist
when posting on ur socials —
or drop us a note and offer to help in some way
everything we do is on a volunteer basis —
             when we say  YOU CAN BE A FLOMMIST TOO  this is wat we mean

THANK YOU
your support helps our continued efforts
to create content across numerous platforms

clic 「 HIER   」 to return to the DER TUNG front page